Running 101: by a non-expert runner

There are many women like me. Maybe some men as well.

We were athletic in our youth and then odd things called life, children, work, laziness, and excusitis crept in. One day (technically it takes more than one day, but it’s like we’re hypnotized until something shakes sense back to our brains) we wake up a little flabby and running up a flight of stairs to break up a sibling smack down is the most exercise we get all week.

That happened to me and I chose to run myself healthy. What I’d like to make clear is if I can run, almost anyone else can too, barring physical limitations or advice from a health care practitioner.

If you’re a regular visitor to Jack Straw Lane (and the only running you’d ever do is away from post-apocalyptic hordes and you believe runners are crazy – which we kind of are) you’re thinking, “Dude…again with the running thing? Snoring…” just skip ahead to the gratuitous photo of the shirtless man at the bottom of this post. On the way, if you catch a sentence or two, it’ll be gravy for both of us.

When I set out to run for the first time, I looked to other runners for advice. The experts can be intimidating despite their knowledge – because of their knowledge even. Their perfectly toned 27-year-old bodies may contribute to the intimidation factor too.

What I counted on most were words of wisdom and encouragement from friends who ran. (My apologies to these friends who I thought of as total fruitloops for running in the first place – I get it now.). They patiently fielded my 694 emails about breathing, stride, fueling, shoes, winter gear, stretching, and countless other concerns I had.

I’ve noticed questions cropping up from acquaintances about running lately, so here is a crash course in running:

Getting started

1. Make a commitment to yourself to dedicate 30 minutes 3 times every week to your running program. Do NOT short-change this time.
2.  If you have a smartphone or iPod download a Zero to 5km running app. The one I chose for my iPhone is Get Running. It was easy to follow and delivered results.
3.  If you don’t have a smartphone, there are many great sites that provide a framework to base your schedule on.
4.  All of these programs will have you alternate walking and running in the early stages.
5.  You will not always feel like running, but you will always feel better for having done it.

Worked for me

Where to run

1. Wherever you want to.
2.  If you have a gym membership – great, there are probably treadmills waiting for you.
3.  If you don’t do the gym thing – get outside or use a home treadmill. I’m an outdoor runner. I prefer the change in scenery, the elements, and the smell of fresh air. Sometimes you’re treated to eau de skunk or parfum de poubelle, but running past lavender in August more than makes up for it.

What to wear

1. The best pair of properly fitted shoes within your budget. Do yourself a favour and shop at a running store where well-trained people can help with your shoe selection.
2. Comfortable, weather appropriate, workout gear (this does not have to come from a chichi store), a headband or ball cap with wicking material to prevent salty sweat from stinging your eyes (gross, but true), a sports bra (no one wants those babies bouncing around and bruising anyone), and sunglasses (squinting is passé).
3. Running is one of the most financially accessible physical fitness choices. All you need are workout clothes, a decent pair of shoes, and a sidewalk.

Your MOST important purchase.

Stretch, stride and breathe

1. I do a few dynamic stretches prior to running and about 10 minutes of static stretching following a run. You. Must. Stretch. Or you’ll wake up one morning with stiff glutes and sitting on the toilet will be a pain. Or so I’ve heard.
2. A short stride where most of the leg movement is centered below my body works best for me. I save the longer strides for a sprint at the end. If you continuously run with a long stride you’ll risk overextending and injuring yourself.
3. My knees stay low. As I told a passing motorist recently who felt the need to stop and tell me to lift my knees, “I’m running, not marching jacka$$.”
4. A combination of nose and mouth breathing works best, but this is personal. You need to experiment with breath counts/stride and nose & mouth breathing to find what gives you enough oxygen to manage a run. Don’t worry about how you sound or look. I’ve mastered the art of sounding like a woman in labour (minus the screaming) and though I may frighten old ladies walking their small dogs, it works for me.

Fueling up

1. There are no hard and fast rules, regardless of what the experts say. According to the experts carbo-loading before a long run is good fuel. For me….it’s a recipe for nausea.
2.  If I’m running within 20 minutes of waking up I fuel with water only. If I’m running later than that, a small breakfast of coffee, a banana and a small yogurt is enough.
3. Bring water or other hydrating fluids on your runs. It helps combat fatigue. By the time you’re tired or thirsty it is too late and you’ve begun to dehydrate.

About me

1.  I am not a certified trainer or running expert.
2. I am slow. My goal is running and I only compete against myself.
3. I run with music. You can see the tunes I like to run to here, but this is very personal.
4.  I am a runner

You don’t have to be fast. Check out Slowpoke Charlie (me).

This morning I felt like crapola. Like really bad crapola. I’m hormonal, and frankly, for women that’s about 23.5 days out of 30. I’m functioning on too little sleep, as most parents are. The extra doses of chocolate lately probably aren’t helping and I fell off the training wagon this summer.

I didn’t feel like running this morning. I was even whining about it, “I don’t feel well. I’m tired.” Ask D. But I went because running makes me stronger, I feel better mentally, and I have a race coming up on September 30th. And I never ever EVER want to be out of breath again when I have to run upstairs to break up a sibling smack down. I need the breath to lay down the law.

What’s your favourite workout?

How do you beat the I don’t wannas?

Gratuitous shirtless man, like I promised. (Nicklas Erik Lidström – one of the best defencemen ever.)

Just a little recap and I’m done. I swear.

I promise — no more talking, writing, or dreaming about running the ½ marathon after today.

But now, simple truths and happy surprises from this Sunday:

* 21.1 kilometers is really far. I’d like to meet the Einstein that thought this would be a fun jaunt…except it was fun. Hard too, but that’s what training is for. To mentally prepare for the self-torture you willingly put yourself through.

*  I set a goal that I never could have imagined accomplishing even one year ago, trained for it, and saw it done.

* The course was packed with 2200 inspiring, strong, dedicated women. They came in all ages, shapes, and sizes, and they were all following through on a commitment.

* The ½ marathon goddesses, the ones that break sound barriers and finish in 1h20m, took moments to nod or share encouragement with their fellow runners – specifically the pokier ones >>>>> insert my face here.

* D is the best pit crew and helped me prepare for race day. Driving home yesterday he confessed that he was relieved it was over because I was getting “a bit testy lately.” I forgive him.

* The medals, which are actually beautiful Foxy Originals necklaces, totally rock! I did it for the bling.

* My brother woke up at 6:00 am on a Sunday and drove to Toronto with his daughters to watch me start and finish.

* I got an, “I’m proud of you maman,” from my son.

* 2200 racers showed my kids and nieces that even epic (have to speak their language) achievements are possible with a little oomph.

* My best friend ran her first race in Winnipeg on the same day. A mom of 4 young children, with a husband who needs to travel for work, a job, a crazy-talented crafty gene, and all the other things she does in one day that I can’t manage in 5… and she found time to start running. I’m prouder of her than she can possibly know.

After dropping Bou off at school I drove to the lake and sat by the shore. It’s not often I sit quietly and savour my coffee. No rushing through construction zones to get home. No rushing anywhere today, I can barely manage a shuffle.

After going over how monumental it was for me to run 21k – a 44-year-old woman who started running 2 years ago as a way to manage stress, breathlessness when walking up stairs, and rising blood pressure – I understand better that there isn’t much we can’t accomplish if we truly want to.

The reasons we set out to do things aren’t always clear until the job is finished. I thought I set out to run a ½ marathon because I wanted to prove to myself that I could. It’s a little bigger than that. I can’t say I’m ever going to do it again. I might. Or not. Although I hear there’s a nice one along the ocean in Vancouver. It’s evident now that my reason for running was mainly to test my mettle. Did I have enough character and strength to do something BIG? I got my answer yesterday.

On to the next scary goal.

The Toronto Women’s Run, and other signs that I’m nuts

It’s now the final countdown to the ½ marathon that I’m running at the end of May and I’ve made some drastic decisions.

To start with…umm…I’m running 21.1 freaking kilometers. So that’s pretty drastic. If you sense a note of panic creeping into my tone, you’re freaking right. Holy freak!

Now that my breakdown is out of the way…

I need to revamp my training diet for the next 4 weeks. Conventional running wisdom recommends a diet complete with healthy carbohydrates to fuel the body. I am not conventional or wise, and I know my body. Last year when training for, and running, a 15k race I quickly discovered what worked for me and what made me want to lose my lunch all over the road.

There’s also no point in giving other participants an unfair advantage by running with a handicap and dragging around more of my posterior than I need to. These drastic measures are meant to create a fair playing field for everyone. Especially me.

So what’s this big, scary dietary change that I’m making? I’m cutting carbs. “Woah! That’s crazy talk woman.” Yes it is. Until May 27th I will not eat most carbs. I’m still all over the fruits.

This means no bread. *Gasp* I don’t think I can survive without bread. Especially a crusty baguette warm from the oven and covered with goat cheese. Or a really hearty pain de seigle slathered with butter and honey. Can’t you just smell it? It makes your mouth water. It makes my mouth water. How about those delicious and dense loaves of potato bread that my local Italian bakery does so well? All. off. limits.

Pasta or rice as an accompaniment at dinner will be a distant memory. Except that I’ll see and smell it regularly. I still have family meals to prepare. I’m not crying over this one, but I’ll still moan about it to milk any sympathy I can from D.

I have a love-love relationship with pastries. <<<< This will be my greatest challenge. …besides the bread. Avoiding pastries of all kinds when everywhere you turn there are butter tarts, apple turnovers, pain au chocolat, Portuguese custard tarts, fruit crisp, and croissant is impossible. Or very nearly. help

I’m allowing myself 1 square of 70% dark chocolate per night. Dark chocolate is rich in flavonoids and antioxidants. True story. Also my family has threatened to exile me to the garden shed if I don’t eat chocolate. I become irrational without a steady consumption.

Not sure if I can do this alone and that’s why I’m declaring my intentions from the webtops. It is your solemn duty to keep me on the straight and narrow. Until May 27th, and then I Am Done and you can stop nagging.

My post-race meal will consist of a dish of whatever-the-hell-I-want-to-eat washed down by a pint of something refreshing and containing alcohol. This will be followed soon after by a 90-minute massage with my RMT and a pedicure. After so much physical torture and deprivation, my body and toes will have earned it.

PS. Don’t tell my family in France about the bread and pastries thing or they may stage an intervention. No self-respecting French woman would ever forego her bread.

Pogne and Suisse from Nivon in Valence

Note from Jack Straw Lane: The Toronto Women’s Runs‘ charitable partner is POGO, the Pediatric Oncology Group of Ontario. I’m using the strength of my legs to help raise funds to support this organization. If you would like to support POGO you can do so by sponsoring my run.